I first joined Weight Watchers in the summer of 2014 after seeing a photo of myself and being totally gobsmacked. I felt heavy, hot and uncomfortable and the photos showed it! I knew I had to do something, especially as I had my bf's sister's engagement coming up and i would be meeting a lot of his family for the first time. I desperately wanted to make a good impression and I actually did really well, losing just over 2 stone in a few weeks. I felt so much better for it; my clothes fitted better and I felt a lot more lively and confident. The thing is though, for me it just wasn't sustainable and I soon felt myself drifting back into old habits. 

I'd never previously admitted it to anyone, but I have a huge problem with binge eating. I had - and still have - stashes of food (chocolate, biscuits, crisps and such) hidden away and genuinely think nothing of eating the lot in one sittiing, although I've been really good this year and haven't touched any of them! I know it's unhealthy and yes, it is greedy, but I just crave more and more food. Once I have the taste for something, I want to eat it again, and then another packet until before I know it, I'm surrounded by empty packets and a stomach full of guilt. I'm not embarrassed to admit it, but I'm not proud of it either.

Last summer I gave up Weight Watchers. It all just became too much for me and quite honestly I just needed a break from the diet! I had holidays, days out and barbecues with friends and I just couldn't keep it up. I just thought, 'screw it, I'm having that ice cream, I need to have some fun'. And that was that! One ice cream at the park turned into burgers at barbecues, chocolate at the cinema and an abundance of rich foods at Christmas. Stepping back on the scales at New Year's made me realise just how easy it was to put the weight back on, as in the space of 6 months I'd gained just over half a stone and so I was finally ready to join Weight Watchers again.

Joining Weight Watchers opened my eyes up to how people are *supposed* to be eating. I say that in a sincere way because of course, I believe everyone is free to eat whatever they like without getting the third degree. There's nothing I hate more than drinking a glass of Diet Coke at work and being faced with "Ergh, why do you drink that stuff?", "It's really bad for you" and "I don't allow my kids to drink that stuff". Yep, I genuinely hear those comments on an alost daily basis! But I've also learned some things about myself on the way. This is my personal journey; everyone has their own story, but here are 5 things I've learned along the way:

1. Sharing really is caring.

At my first Weight Watchers group, the leader never stayed for the 'chat' and so I often felt like I was on my own, just turning up for a 5 minute weigh-in and going home. At my new group however, almost everyone who weighs in at the class stays until the end of the session and our leader starts a discussion that enables us to all share ideas and talk about our week, be it good or bad. I feel like I'm part of something and it doesn't matter if I have a bad week, because the group are encouraging and positive. Instead of beating myself up about it, I know that I'll just try harder the next week.

2. Wholemeal is heartier (and tastes exactly the same!)

If you'd have asked me 2 years ago what I'd prefer - white pasta or wholemeal pasta - I'd have instantly screwed my nose up at the wholemeal pasta and opted for the white pasta - with LOTS of sauce! But now I've learned that there are different chemicals inside these foods, whereby the wholemeal foods actually make you fuller for longer, with slower releasing energy than white pasta. It's also way healthier and doesn't make you feel bloated. I always looked at the wholemeal foods and imagined that they'd taste dry and bitty (because they're usually speckled with flecks of brown) but the truth is they don't really taste any different - although wholemeal pasta takes slightly longer to cook! Lasagne is my favourite, so knowing that I can use wholemeal pasta sheets is a winner!

3. Smoothies aren't as healthy as you think they are! 

Ok so here's the deal - at Weight Watchers, the ingredients in food is calculated and turned into 'Smart Points'. The more fat/sugar etc the food has, the higher its point value will be and each day I'm limited to a maximum of 30 points. Fruit and vegetables are uber healthy and have a point value of 0, HOWEVER, if you were to take the same fruit and put them into a blender to make a 100% fruit smoothie - no other ingredients added - its point value would rocket up to about 16! I don't know the exact scientific reason for this, but apparently it has something to do with the sugars in the fruit. I think that by blending them, the body absorbs the sugar differently and stores it as fat.

4. Dieting isn't about eating salads.

I mean you can if you want to, but I can't stand a salad! The only one I'll admit to liking is a chicken ceasar salad, and that's because it's smoothered in cheese and a creamy sauce! Because of the point system that Weight Watchers has, I can eat anything so long as I don't exceed my daily points limit. The key word is MODERATION. It means I can have a meal out with friends or I can have an occasional bar of chocolate or slice of cake if I want to, and it's still possible to lose weight! 

5. If at first you don't succeed, buy some different scales!

Ok, so this one's kind of a joke. What I actually mean is that if you're not happy, do something about it! I wasn't happy at all at my last Weight Watchers group and I lost all motivation because there was no support for me there. After a 6 month hiatus from the programme I joined a different group and honestly I feel so much happier for it and much more determined. I was so close to achieveing my goal before and I fell at the last hurdle, but this group is much better for me and the leader is a lot more down to Earth about everything that I actually want to reach my goal not only for myself but for her also as a way of thanks. 

I adore Birchbox and I honestly feel all warm and fuzzy inside whenever I open the pink cardboard box with my name on it. This month's box was created in association with Pinterest and had lots of goodies inside to help wipe away those New Year's blues, as well as five specially designed postcards that can either be used or displayed. 

The first product is a 'protect and detangle' leave in conditioner spray by Beauty Protector. I've used this product twice now and I have to be honest here... it's... okay. That's it really. It smells really sugary sweet that it's a little bit sickly and it doesn't really make my hair feel any smoother like you would expect from a conditioner. On the plus side though, it seems to be good at protecting against heat and it doesn't feel sticky or heavy in my hair like some other products have done in the past.

Next up is the Whish body butter. This smells so fresh and creamy and contains shea and raspberry butter to moisturise, seaweed extract to firm and rice bran oil to purify. I've actually only used this product on my hands as a hand cream as I tend to wash my hands quite a lot at work and they get very dry, but the results are quite long lasting and it doesn't leave that horrible sticky film on your skin.

I haven't had a chance to use the Absolution 'night and morning water' yet so it would be unfair of me to comment, but it smells very fresh and so I'm looking forward to trying it!

The first item of make up is Benefit's 'They're Real' tinted lash primer. This is a brown primer that you apply to your lashes before putting on mascara. It did work quite well and made my lashes look long and healthy, but since I usually layer up several coats of mascara anyway, it didn't look too dissimilar to my usual look. 

The next item in the box is probably my favourite out of all of the items this month. I'd never heard of Jelly Pong Pong Cosmetics before, but their illuminating eyeliner is actually amazing. Apparently it's 'in fashion' at the moment to wear light eyeliner to make your eyes look bigger and more awake and I actually love it! It lasts for a super long time and has earned pride of place in my daily make up bag.

The final item in the box is a compact mirror. Although I have lots of these already it's always useful to have spares in case of emergencies!

Do you subscribe to Birchbox?

Have you used any of these products?

I'd love to know what you think!

I've never read Dracula. 

I wanted to, partly because it was a gothic, cult classic but also because I really liked the cover, but it wasn't until my bf and I went to York to visit a friend at Uni that that all changed. 

My friend had taken the day off from one of his lectures and we decided to go to the beach for some proper northern fish, chips and gravy. We decided to go to Whitby and after a short drive through the Yorkshire Moors, we arrived! Since my friend was in his third year at Uni, he had already been to Whitby and so he gave us a tour.

As we walked around we realised that there were a LOT of people wearing black; trench coats, dresses and lots of chains. Our friend explained that it may be because Whitby is famous for Jet, a black gem stone, however we later found out it was 'Goth Week', where people travel from all over the country to watch live performances and readings of Dracula in Whitby Abbey.

The Abbey is owned by English Heritage and is absolutely beautiful. Apparently it was home to monks back in the day, but is most famous for being the inspiration behind Bram Stoker's 'Dracula'.

I'm a huuuuge fan of Mac lipsticks and bought the original Mac Miley Viva Glam lipstick last year. As with all Mac lipsticks I loved it however it isn't an everyday wear as the pink pigment is so vibrant and bold that I can't really pull it off.

A few months ago Mac released the Miley Vivia Glam II lipstick, which is an orange coral colour. At first I was reluctant to buy it as it was so similar to 'Barbecue' from Mac's 'Toledo' collection, which I already own, but eventually temptation got the better of me! Every penny that is paid for a Viva Glam lipstick goes to charity, so it's totally ok :) 

The packaging for this lipstick is exactly the same at the other Viva Glam lipsticks, consisting of a pink twist tube as opposed to a silver twist tube, but the Miley editions have her signature printed on them. Her signature is also embossed on the box.

The colour is very bold with a matte finish. I love mac lipsticks for their strong pigments and they last for such a long time but I do prefer creamsheen formulas to matte formulas, as they glide on a lot more smoothly and give a pretty shine. As usual with Mac lipsticks, I absolutely LOVE the vanilla smell.

My only piece of advice is you're using this lipstick is that you really would benefit from using a liner, as the matte formula gives the edge of your lip a bit of a fuzzy edge, rather than a smooth line. I use a neutral lip liner by Lord & Berry as it's so versatile and goes with any lip colour.

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